Some Background

There are so many psychologists who have studied child development. It is really easy to get lost in the quagmire. (I get lost no matter where I go…I have a terrible sense of direction.)

If you’re like I was, just getting through the day and not killing my baby felt like a great accomplishment. I was SO OVERWHELMED after my daughter was born that I could barely function. I now recognize that I was battling with postpartum depression which, back in 1987, wasn’t a publicized condition. The last thing in the world I cared about was what a bunch of psychologists had to say. I HAD studied a lot of that during my undergrad years but didn’t really keep it in the forefront of my thoughts.

Just in case you are curious, one of the most widely accepted hierarchy of human needs was published by a guy named Maslow. His hierarchy is usually the first that people who study these things study. It’s pretty basic but we humans are not basic so there are many more guys and girls with many more ideas about human development varying in complication. (https://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html) Of course this hierarchy isn’t a checklist. It’s not like you have one component, check it off, and go to the next. All of us move in and out of most of these levels as we go through our lives. We can have all or some of several levels on one day and have a different combination of components the next. We always need a combination of all levels to be healthy human beings.

In my previous post I suggested a couple of ways to start to begin to lay a strong foundation for love and security building with your baby. If you looked at Maslow’s hierarchy, you will note that love and belonging is in the middle of the hierarchy but children (and the rest of us) are in constant need of everything in this level. What I suggested in that post is not a complete list of all you can do (duh) but it’s a starting point. The fact is, all positive interactions you have with your baby and child is a block in the building of a secure and confident human. Loving human touch and communication is essential. The more the better.

What are some ways you have found to build feelings of love and security with your babies/children? Please give us some good ideas in the comments.