Some of our happiest days were when our home was filled with our children and their friends whose family origins began in a wide variety of countries and a variety of sexual identities. We had a rainbow rich with learning, laughing, and loving and we came to know, first hand, that what we all had in common was far greater than the differences we had in customs, religions, etc. The most important commonalities we shared were respect and value for others as humans. I often find myself longing for those days because there was so much laughter and fun and love.
How do we raise our youth to value others? How do we instill respect and the love of learning from other cultures so they don’t grow up with hate and vitriol for others who are not of the same beliefs as they?
In my experience, it’s all about how we adults in all of the systems I discussed in a previous post, model the behaviors we want to instill. Kids are sponges when it comes to observing our words and actions, what we watch on TV and listen to on the radio. You may BELIEVE they’re too young to understand but they never are too young.
Equally important is how we adults in their microsystems value them as individuals. The Search Institute in Minneapolis, Minnesota identified 40 Developmental Assets that are essential to a youth and helping them to thrive. They need to feel loved and secure and know that they are valued before they can value others. Pictured below are all of the assets that were identified as part of a study in 2010. I’ve omitted the survey results because they’re 10 years old. (You can read the original document by clicking on the image.) Given a strong sense of self-value and security, youth will be able to more readily appreciate others. Below is the list of assets.
I view this list as a starting point for parents to consider. No child will ever have 100% of each developmental asset and that is OK. Life isn’t perfect, parents are perfect, the world is imperfect. The crucial goal is to enrich these assets as much as humanly possible. There will be some days, of course, that are better than others. That is the human experience and helps us develop empathy. As this blog progresses I will integrate some of these assets individually or in clusters as they relate to the topic. Stay tuned. 🙂
POSITIVE KIDS 